I never aspired to be a stay at home mom. I never thought much about daycare or the cost of working vs the benefits of staying at home. I just never thought that being a stay at home mom was something I was going to do. Along came Serenity to change all of that!
My 6 week maternity leave came to an end and I went back to work like I always thought I would. Not being happy with the job I was doing at the time (nor was it much help to us), I thought why not go for something else? Lets see what I can do now since I'm not pregnant and waiting for the bundle to arrive. I started running numbers and thinking about what I was going to do with my little bundle of joy while I was out working. Daycare? Grandma's? How much was I going to have to work to offset the costs? I quickly realized that I was going to be making some changes that I never thought possible. Financially staying at home with the little one was actually going to be a plus. Also I really did not want to have my daughter spending more time with someone else than she does with mommy and daddy (who works out of town a lot).
So I now find myself in the interesting job of staying at home with my little one. A blessing and curse all in one!
Okay, so more a blessing than a curse....especially now that I found some of these tips to help me keep my sanity (which has slowly been fading) and create a happier atmosphere for all of us.
Helpful Tips for the stay at home moms (and dads too):
1. Get organized.
Thank goodness I am typically organized, but from what I'm understanding I need to be even more so. Schedules help keep everything working smoothly and scheduling time to clean, be alone, etc. help a mom keep on track. Schedules should be flexible enough to accommodate the special occasions, but also be durable enough to stick to. Many moms found it easier to schedule by the hour and others by the day. We've already got an hourly schedule, need to work on a weekly schedule to keep this house somewhat clean!
2. Stay organized.
Make your schedules and stick to them as best you can. Obviously things are going to get in the way from time to time, but it is best to get back on track. Being self-motivated it is easier to stay motivated if you have a schedule you can follow.
3. Get out of the house.
Many moms found it best to get out of the house at least once or twice a week. Others needed the break once a day. Taking a trip to the grocery store, going for a walk, playgroups, library visits, etc. give us the break we need. It is important to change your surroundings. Plus it forces you to take a shower and get dressed in something besides pajama pants and a tee-shirt. We've already got this down, though having more fruitful ventures might be in the works.
4. Share the Load.
Just because you are staying at home does not mean that everything household related is your responsibility. Share the load with your partner or even your older kids (if you have them). This I've finally got the grasp of, though it did take a while to unburden myself of those few drops of responsibility I share. I'm not the only one that can wield a spatula or dishcloth!!
5. Don't forget about you!
You have to take time out for yourself. Read a book, enjoy a bubble bath, just spend some alone time enjoying something you love. This is crucial for your overall happiness and health and therefore directly relates to the happiness and health of your family. Thus indulge in you from time to time and make that time a bit more frequent than you already do. This is something I still struggle with at times. After bedtime is the best time for me!
6. Pick your battles
Be a bit selective of what is important to battle about and what is not. Set your priorities and stick to them. Eating applesauce for the 3rd day in a row for lunch is not going to hurt. Playing in the toilet, on the other hand, is gross. Don't worry about the little things that really don't matter in the long run. Give yourself a break and let things slide from time to time. This is a challenge for me, but I'm slowly learning!
7. Cleaning vs playtime
Many moms suggest cleaning on a schedule and making priorities for cleaning tasks. Suggestions were ensuring that one room a day gets cleaned or ensuring that one room stays clean throughout the week (like the kitchen). Laundry can be washed at night and dried in the morning. Block out time for cleaning and leave the rest of the day for playtime. Playtime is important for development, so make sure you spend time with them too. I'm working on this. Think this is where a good schedule could come in handy!
8. Outlet
You need an outlet to help cope with the daily successes, struggles, frustrations, and joys. Joining a moms group, friends, family, online groups, etc. can provide mom with an outlet of understanding and encouragement that will contribute to the overall health of your family. It is important to have others around to keep all those frustrations at bay and to help you celebrate the successes! I'm in the development process of this tip. Unfortunately I still vent on the husband more than he is capable of handling!
9. Check your guilt
Again don't stress about the small stuff. Learn to accept your limitations. Don't feel guilty because you can not do everything. Do the best that you can. That is all anyone is asking for, nothing more. Therefore leave your guilty feelings at the door. This is probably one of the hardest things to do since I believe all moms are hardwired to feel guilty about something!
10. Have Fun!
The most important thing is to have fun and enjoy your family. Your children will only be at this age for so long. Enjoy them now in each stage they are in for tomorrow it will change.
I hope these tips help some of the stay at home moms out there enjoy their job a bit more. I know I will be implementing a few more of these at home to create a much more enjoyable atmosphere!
No comments:
Post a Comment